'Dear Lady Gaga: Remember When You Were Fun?'

and this is not her church.

follow me until you love me | call my name

I want your love, and all your lovers' recommendations

Only gods are worshipped unconditionally. People have to earn their love.

And Lady Gaga is only human - without question both deservedly famous and polarising, talented and fallible.

She attracts more fawning fanboyism than any artist with only two albums deserves, and just as much uninformed criticism from those who underestimate her.

So welcome to the middle - where we want the best from her... but good or bad, we'll take everything for what it is.

I'm 20, straight and Australian; part-time metalhead/pop fan, full-time music obsessive. I'm writing about every Madonna single here: The comparisons aren't entirely valid, but no one is more important than Madonna in understanding what Lady Gaga could be.

You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, my personal Tumblr and Last.fm, or harass me via email at richaod AT gmail DOT com.

Sat Sep 25

'Dear Lady Gaga: Remember When You Were Fun?'

Fun Gaga was simple and hot like Mexico. Current Gaga is multidimensional and mad deep. Which makes me wonder, why so serious?! Gaga says to dance in the dark. OK, but … I CAN’T because I’m a-scared! I’m still trippin’ off seeing “Paranormal Activity” when it came out LAST October!! I can’t turn off my lights without seeing monsters in my bed eating my heart and brain and then blowtorching the rest. But then later, after watching my dearly beloved “It’s On With Alexa Chung,” I find out that “Dance In The Dark” is simply a metaphor for those of us with low self-esteem and shiz. A META-WHAT?! That is just TOO much for me. But what about all those innocent people who missed the Alexa Chung interview? How will they know the secret meaning?! HOW WILL THEY SURVIVE?! They won’t. They’ll just be dancing around alone in their pitch-black rooms, waiting for Gaga to get back to the sparkle. And don’t EVEN get me started on this “Alejandro” dude, because I’ve about had it with him. Gaga is still talking about him after she ditched him but … she just can’t be with him like this anymore!! And here I am thinking we weren’t supposed to fall in love with paper gangsters. Mr. Jandro is the original paper gangster. Alejandro is the O.G. of P.G.s!

Dear Lady Gaga: remember when your style had no substance and your music was mediocre? Anyone could’ve written Just Dance, but you, girl, should keep reaching for the stars.

On whoever wrote that article… I guess camp demands camp?